Deep In My Heart

Today i think i had too much drinks... after going for drinking sessions to session with the crew....even went to a pub with girls putting thier arms around u when u are alone and even footsie you.... but i hold myself well and rejected them well... but after going back home with lots of drinking... i felt that my emotions are all out... i really felt like a loser at times.... angry with myself... feeling that oh my God when are u going to deliver me? i am suffering now... why ppl out there playing can enjoy themselves... yet me trying to be mr nice guy get trampled... unappreciated and sick in the heart of my dreams feared not to come to pass.... i dunno wad to do at times... i am just angry with myself... and i am pretty lost... does it pay to be gd... currently not really.... or maybe i am too hurt that some gesture i may overloook... sorry to those ppl who tried... i am really weak now...